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I resisted thinking that I might have been “the black sheep” because to me it was an admission of the rejection that I had always felt; rejection that I was terrified to acknowledge.
I believed that I exaggerated ~ and believed this definition of me was proof that I was the one in the wrong and thus the beginning of the Black Sheep Syndrome.
Being defined that way created a default mode where I was always examining ME and not “them” which served a great purpose for abusers and controllers.
Publically, these things were said to discredit me. Why do those foundations get laid in by the controllers in the first place. I was defined as moody and sullen, which may have been true, but why was I moody and sullen?
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It seems to me as I get more and more clarity into the dysfunctional family system that just as the grooming process of a child is methodical, so is the discrediting process of that same child.